Bonus: A Thousand Thank-Yous

A thousand listens later, we’re clinking an imaginary glass and sharing the real secret that makes a ceremony feel like yours: a thoughtful consult call. Before timelines tighten and group chats explode, that first conversation gives us a clear read on your voice, your values, and how you want to feel standing there. We walk through the questions that matter—how long you want to be up front, whether you want vows out loud or private, how to handle unity rituals, and what “no religion” or “please skip objections” actually looks like in practice.

You’ll hear how we translate “short and sweet” into minutes and moments, not clichés. We talk through venue realities like microphones versus waterfalls, keeping grandparents in the loop, and crafting a plan B that protects your words if weather flips. Family dynamics get care too: kids with rings, blended parents, honoring loved ones who’ve passed, and avoiding assumptions that can bruise feelings. Along the way, we show how hobbies, inside jokes, and favorite shows can slip into the script without turning the ceremony into a skit—subtle lines that make guests think, this is so them.

We also open the books on how quotes are built—length, customization, unity elements, rehearsal needs, travel—and why clarity now beats confusion later. Then a little party favor: our end‑of‑year bonus wheel for couples who complete a consult between Thanksgiving and New Year, with perks like 25% off, an included unity ceremony, two hours of vow help, or rehearsal support, plus a small extra for anyone who mentions the podcast. If you’re getting married in Pennsylvania, New York, or New Jersey—or you’re ready to fly me somewhere meaningful—let’s talk.

Enjoyed the episode? Follow, rate, and share with a couple who wants a ceremony that feels personal, calm, and true to their story. Subscribe for more behind‑the‑mic insights, and tell us: what element would you add to your dream ceremony?

Chapters

• 0:00 Milestone And Bonus Episode Reveal
• 1:05 Global Listeners And Country Shoutouts
• 2:50 U.S. States And City Stats
• 5:20 Gratitude And What’s Next
• 7:30 Why Consult Calls Matter
• 10:20 Personalizing Ceremonies And Options
• 13:30 Guests, Family Dynamics, And Logistics
• 16:00 Venue, Sound, And Mic Decisions
• 18:00 Hobbies, Budgets, And Quote Building
• 20:30 Reading The Room And Managing Stress
• 23:00 The End‑Of‑Year Bonus Wheel

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:04

The wedding wear with officiating Diamanda. Welcome back to The Wedding Wear. And today we have a bonus episode. Super, super excited, especially since we have not even hit a year yet as a podcast. And drumroll, please. We have over 1,000 listens. Ah, so excited. Can't believe it because this was just going to be like a ha ha for fun while unemployed type thing. And I'm absolutely loving it. I think I drop in every conversation, like, oh, the podcast. I have a podcast. Would you listen to my podcast? And some of that must be sticking because people are listening. And when I first hit a thousand, I was like, okay, well, maybe some of this is people who put it on in the background and don't really listen. So then I was like, I'll wait until North America hits a thousand listens. And then I'll wait until the United States hits a thousand listens. So we are decently over a thousand. And I figured it was high time to send out a bonus episode and get everything celebrated and really honor everyone who's been listening in. Please, please do not be a stranger. Whatever platform you're listening on, drop a like, drop a line, drop a comment. Feel free to share it over to others who may enjoy some of these stories. I am really hoping in 2026 to have more vendor interviews, more bride interviews, and even with couples that I didn't do their wedding, just because I think that there's so many stories to be considered. And I always have fun doing them. Takes a while to edit, but I always have fun doing them. So thank you so much if you have been listening from an early episode or day one and you've laughed along the way. Thank you if this is just something that you play in the background. Thank you if you the one episode really hilarious and you shared it over or you listened more than once. It means an absolute ton. So, in this bonus episode, I'm going to share a little about console calls and why they're my favorite part of the process in weddings. But before doing that, I want to give some accolades to our global and national locations that we have listeners from. I think I shared previously. We are officially not just international, but worldwide, with the exception of Antarctica. There has been one listen to an episode in every continent. Absolutely, absolutely insane. I cannot, and I can't tell you the joy I get when I see a new country. And I'll post the flag in like the family chat with my parents, my in-laws, my husband, and let them guess which country the flag is from. It's just super, super cool. So wanting to give a shout out to yeah, maybe I'll put in real from sound. Outside of the United States, we have listeners in the Netherlands, Brazil, France, Singapore, Canada, Russia, Germany, Estonia, Australia, Italy, Lebanon, Belgium, Martinia, United Kingdom, Turkey, and Ireland. Crazy. So that's 17 countries. And maybe if I'm setting some metric goals for 2026, I want to be at 25 or more. Lofty. I know. Very, very lofty. And then we get to this the US, and I'm beside words for the number of states that I've had listeners in. At one point I was like, oh, it'd be cool to have one in every state that I've been to. And with the exception of a few states, like we're we're almost there. Like, and in fact, I've there's more people who listen than there are states I've been to. So I've got a nice little color-coded map here. And I'm just gonna read them down. Washington, Oregon, California, Indiana, Idaho, Utah, Arizona, Colorado, Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas, Iowa, Missouri, Louisiana, Illinois, Michigan, Ohio, Tennessee, Alabama, Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, Delaware, New Jersey, New York, Connecticut, Massachusetts, and bringing it all home with the most listens, not surprised at all, is Pennsylvania. And within Pennsylvania, we've got a lot, like top, so top 10 cities here. I'll give you, I'll give you this last stat here, I promise. We've got the most listeners in Bretting, Pennsylvania, which was my home for many, many years. Shout out to all of my neighbors in off of 422 and 222, and then the 610, giving this a listen. We then have Philadelphia. We have Milford, which is my current home, Pottsville, and Schuylkillhaven, where I just moved from. Then leaving the Pennsylvania world, we got Dallas, Texas as the next highest, followed by New City, New York. Hi Millie, love you. We have Federal Way, Washington, Hackettstown, New Jersey. I think I know who my loyal listeners are there, and wrapping up with Stratsburg, Pennsylvania, which okay, it's probably my parents. They're just right over the river there, the creek. But uh yeah, so absolutely excited. So whether you've listened from a city, a farm, a beach, a mountain in your car, on a commute, on a plane or a train, just thank you. Thank you so much. The listens as they come in, they keep me motivated, they keep me going to keep doing this. And I love every note of feedback that I get about the episodes and where you'd want more content. And if I should do more stories or interviews or the things you like, please keep sharing. Keep it coming. Let's go with it. So, for the real content today, for the bonus episode, I wanted to talk a little bit about consult calls, which are actually one of my favorite parts of being an efficient. And that's kind of weird. Uh, you would think it would be actually like the wedding, but the console gives me such a unique snippet into the couple. And it's it's mutual, you know. I'm trying to assess their needs and how I can best help. They're trying to assess who I am and what I can bring to the table for their wedding day. Pretty much half my entire script pitch offerings down pat. But there's so much to be learned there. And it's really a lot of times before the in the moment stress. So you've got couples who have a date, a venue, they're very happy, positive, the outlook is good, they're hoping to get their vendors solidified, and they aren't in any sort of crisis mode yet, which is very helpful. You also get couples who are, yeah, we're simple. We are just doing an elopement. And they enter these calls with so much more ease where they don't even think that they have questions to ask, which is awesome. I normally find at least one or two that they could ask. So I always start console calls with the same, the same kind of thing. I explain a little bit who I am and that I can do a wedding in three legal lines and a signed piece of paper. It doesn't have to be long. It doesn't have to be religious. It can be whatever the couple wants it to be. And I share some examples of Star Wars weddings that I've done, or weddings that were 35 minutes long and very religious, weddings that were really highly personalized, and ones that were 10 minutes on a beach with personal vows. So just letting them know that there are no right or wrong answers and that I'm just going to put together a quote that makes sense to what it is that they're looking for and what I can offer. And that they this is just a quote. It's not binding. They don't have to go with me, just keeping it very open and very relaxed. And then I want to hear about them. How did you meet? How long have you been together? What tell me about the proposal? How has the wedding planning process gone so far? What has life been like the last two years, five years, seven years? Have you bought a house? Have you moved? Do you have pets? Do you have kids? And again, nothing needs to be in super specific detail, but just how do you like to spend your time together and how have you spent your time together? Some vendors for weddings will jump right into contract details, but that's not really what I want to do. I like to get to know you. I will learn a lot more by you saying, oh, yes, we we're not really wordy people. Great. Tells me you might not want your home voice. So I'll strike that out. We won't even worry about it. We'll just keep it going. And I don't like to normally work off of like a true checklist. It's kind of a, ah, you've said this. I heard it. I understand. And now let me ask this follow-up, or let me get additional clarification information. After I learn about the couples and where they come from, what they do, I then dive into like the ceremony. So I'm like, okay, put yourself in your head for your ceremony. Let's make sure we've got the right date, the right location, if you have a time. Let's just get all of that right now. And then how long do you want to be standing up there? I used to ask, well, how long do you want the ceremony? And everyone says, short and sweet. But as we've talked about before, short and sweet is not a quantifiable length of time. It is different for everybody. So I instead ask, how long do you, as the couple, want to be standing up there? And a lot of times they will say a length of time, 15 minutes or 20 minutes. And then they will start telling me things that they want added in, which in my world are like, okay, that might build out a little more time. Or they'll start telling me things that they don't really want. And that might lessen the time a little bit. But just knowing what their starting off benchmark is of what would be too long of a ceremony for them, that's always a really, really great place to start. And so once we're there, I'm like, okay, are there very open-endedly any elements you do or don't want within the wedding? And keep it open-ended. I do have a whole side list of things that people have desperately wanted or really not wanted. And I'll get to them. But starting off the bat, is there anything? And this is where I get, we are writing our own vows. Or we're going to write our own, but we're not going to share them out loud. I get a lot of we do not want religion. It's a very, this is our line in the sand, and we are not moving forward, which is totally fine. I get quite a few couples who say, we don't need objections. And I let them know that legally you don't have to ask for them. So I typically don't, unless a couple requests that they do. After we get through some of those big like yes and no's, I ask if they've thought about unity ceremony or if I could answer any questions on that. For couples looking more than like a 10-minute ceremony, it's a good, it's a good element to have. It's more involvement than a reading would be where I'm just standing up there talking. And there's a ton of them that could be made to feel very authentic to the couple. I ask some questions about like who all's going to be there. I don't base my quotes on the number of guests, but it's always nice for me to know: is this just five people in a living room? Are there kids involved and they're actually going to be a part of the ceremony? How old are the kids? Are there lots and lots of family members and maybe parents with remarriages? And so I got to kind of plan to not just make assumptions that the woman fixing the bride's veil is her mother. It could be her stepmom or it could be her mother-in-law or helpful aunt. Just little things. And there's sometimes where they'll kind of say, well, doesn't does that really matter? And no, it doesn't. It just doesn't change anything in my realm, but it does give me insights and information that will really help me day of. But I can also operate and act on the fly. And I have many, many times. If there's really important specifics about who walks with who, or that the best man has the rings, but he's getting them from a child. You know, any of those details that you've already gotten figured out, I'd want to know them. That is totally fine by me. That's great. Then and I'm not, I'm not a wedding planner. I'm not a ceremony planner. I could be for the right price. If you want me to plan your ceremony, I totally would, but I'm not. So it's really just more of how much you want to share and what that might teach me. If there's someone going to be giving you away, if you've had like all the grandparents pass away, I might say, Oh, would you have any interest in a moment of silence? They're just some conversation pieces to have. Then we talk a little bit more about like the venue. Okay. Do we know indoors or outdoors? Do we kind of have a plan on if there's going to be weather, cold, or rain? I get asked a lot about if I need a microphone. And that's often what I come back with. Well, tell me what some of the sounds are at the venue. If we're inside at a ballroom, no, I've got a big girl voice. I most likely don't need a microphone. If you guys are doing your own bows, I would recommend that we get one for you guys. If we are outside by a waterfall, then yes, please, a mic would be glorious. I ask then a little bit more about how they spend their time and who they are. So we we kind of start with a who they are, we talk then all the elements of the ceremony, and then I go back to, okay, and what do you do on your weekends when you're free time? If you had some extra walking around money, you could take a vacation or you could do house projects or you could do a nice dinner out. Like just what are you doing? How do you choose to spend your times together? Are there any shows or movies, music, TV, anything that you guys keep coming back to? It makes you laugh. And if I found a really great quote, I could just slip it in and it would, it would ease you. It would make you know that this was your ceremony. I also ask, is there a budget that you want to stick at or under? I always like to be cognizant. I like to work as I can to meet the budgets that the couples have. Not always possible. Not always possible. I use all of the answers to these questions to put together the quotes. And my quotes are really based upon length. Content, am I talking the whole time? Is there something going on? A unity in between? How much customization is needed of the content or how much of the content might be new new? And then we've got kind of like the fees. So things like travel weekday, winter wedding, coming up to, you know, everything from am I needed physically at your rehearsal and I'm running it, or are we doing a Zoom rehearsal? So when I build all of these elements out together into the quote, it's all come from the conversations that we've had. And I'm human, sometimes I miss things. So I certainly always welcome, oh, we don't want this, or oh my gosh, we didn't even realize that this would be a part of it. That doesn't make sense for us. Let's let's get rid of it. But the consult calls are my favorite part because it's our introduction and you can tell a lot about people from that first meeting. Just like they say you can tell a lot about a relationship from a first guest. I do read a lot about which members of the couple are on the console call to kind of see who's driving the ship in this. Questions that come up, who's kind of in the know versus it's always the grooms who typically say, like, oh, you don't do this for free? Nope, nope. I bet you haven't worked a lot at the wedding budget so far because none of the vendors are doing this for free. And it's a great time to get to know them because they're, for the most part, still in the happy planning stage and not the super stress planning stage. And it is far above the stress that they have as we get into the last two months before the wedding or even wedding day when I know whatever I'm saying in that time, they're not, it's not landing. And that's okay. It doesn't need to because I have actually laid out all the things that I'm going to be doing before, during, and after the wedding during the consult call, when I know that they're listening. And so when they've got a few moments after they say I do, and they're like, but oh my gosh, what about my marriage license? I already explained and it's already written out and it's been in the back of their mind from the very beginning. So they don't have to worry about, oh, did Amanda tell us something? And now we've plum forgotten it. Nope. It was all in the console call. It's the best thing. My husband will laugh at me. I leave the consult calls very exhausted, but that's because I put so much energy into them. And I love being able to have the answers to the questions or to be able to provide typical and traditional examples from the weddings I've done. Being able to say to a couple, hey, if you want to hear more of my cadence, my speaking style, my pitch, my voice, you know, listen to the podcast. Or if you'd like to see pictures of weddings I've done, read over scripts like here's my website, here's my email, here's my Facebook, and use that to guide them through. It's really great. And it's taken me a while to be like, I do love the consult calls, but now, yeah, I do. It works out really well. And it sets a really great starting off point with couples. Before I wrap this up, I wanted to give you guys the inside scoop on the end-of-year bonus wheel. So every year between Thanksgiving and the new year, I have a bonus wheel. And so any couple who schedules a consult call and completes the consult call with me gets at the end of their consult a spin on the bonus wheel, and they will get to see their prize reflected in their quotes. Just helps me to formalize more of the business and the weddings for the coming year. And given that there's a lot of times a fair amount of engagements and wedding planning that happens over the holiday season, it makes a really, really great timing. Plus, I also raise my rates at the start of a new year. So it's that last chance to get in on the previous year's rate. So for this year, I'd love it if you guys have any suggestions on what to include. Again, the wheels going live in a few days from now, but please like can customize it all we want. I have a 25% off your ceremony package, a included unity of hand fasting, sand ceremony, or what's that last one? Unity painting. Those are the three that I can do full inclusion on that actually have like tangible items to it. Two hours of vow writing assistance, rehearsal included, with a little asterisk of like pending, pending availability. You know, some things just aren't gonna work out. And yeah, so those are what four? I like to always have five. What would be an additional one that you guys would throw in? And I do this for for everybody, but maybe I'll come up with like an extra little bit that if somebody says the magic word, like I listen to the podcast, or I love the wedding wear, some sort of insider scoop that they get two things off the wheel or something really special. I don't know. I'll have to figure it out. Well, if I had a glass of wine or champagne next to me, I would pour a little drink right now and I would say cheers. Cheers to all of you. Whether you've been listening since day one and episode one, or you just tuned in, thank you so much. Thank you for listening. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for being a part of this really interesting wedding world that I'm in now. If you know of a couple who's getting married, please share this episode with them, especially for good information about what they could expect in a consult call. And even if not a consult call with me, what they should hope to hear from any other vendors. You want the vendors that get to know you, not just say, okay, great, what'd you select from the list? And if they are looking for an officiant and they're in Pennsylvania, New York, New Jersey, or somewhere willing to uh let me travel to, have them reach out. The wedding the bonus wheel is going to be live. And if they mention the podcast, I'll get them an extra treat. Until next time, this has been Amanda, who is elated that we've hit a thousand listeners. Thank you for listening to The Wedding Wear with Officiating by Amanda. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and found some inspiration or insight for your own special day. This podcast is hosted on Buscroute and can be found on all major platforms. If you haven't already, please subscribe, like, comment, and share to help us reach even more listeners who might laugh a little at the wedding wear. For the links referenced in the show, visit Linktree at OfficiatingByAmanda. You can also follow the business on Facebook, WeddingWire, and The Knot to stay up to date on everything going on. If you have a question you'd like me to answer on the podcast, just send an email to the WeddingWare Podcast at gmail.com. And if you're ready to inquire about officiating services for your own big day, you can reach me at officiatingbyamanda at gmail.com. Thank you so much for tuning in, and until next time, this has been Amanda.